Greg read the whole thing.
Export your WhatsApp or iMessage chat. Greg reads every message — all of it — and writes what he really thinks. It's brutal, it's funny, and it's weirdly accurate.
How it works
Export your chat
Straight from WhatsApp or iMessage. Takes 5 minutes. We'll show you how.
Greg reads it
Every message. The fights, the bits, the 2am spirals. He takes notes.
Get the report
Awards, lore, verdicts, receipts. Then send it back to the group — that's the whole point.
Greg doesn't miss a thing
Alex — The “5 Minutes Away” Guy
Alex has claimed to be 5 minutes away 34 times. I checked the timestamps against his arrival messages. The average gap is 23 minutes. On September 9, 2024, it was 51 minutes, during which he sent a photo of a dog he met.
And yet: 34 times, Alex showed up. Late is a love language if you squint.
That same day, while Alex was 51 minutes away, Priya said exactly one thing:
Greg reads everything. Then he connects it.
Your chat is used once to write your report, then permanently deleted. Greg runs on Claude, made by Anthropic — they never train on what you send. Delete your report anytime.
Questions
Who is Greg?
Greg is our AI, powered by Claude from Anthropic. He reads your chat and writes a report on it. Greg is honest, funny, and weirdly accurate.
Which apps does Greg support?
WhatsApp today — it exports right from your phone in four taps. iMessage is next, with a one-click Mac app that's almost ready (join the waitlist inside).
How long does it take?
About 5 minutes for you to export the chat. About 5 minutes for Greg to read it and write your report.
Which chats work best?
All of them. Friend groups, family threads, couple chats, work crews, your situationship. The messier, the better.
Is Greg going to be mean?
Honest, not mean. Greg roasts with receipts and love. And if your chat contains something genuinely heavy, he drops the jokes.
What happens to my chat?
Your chat is used once to write your report, then permanently deleted. Greg runs on Claude, made by Anthropic — they never train on what you send. Delete your report anytime.
How much is it?
The full report is a one-time purchase — no subscription, no account required. The price is shown at checkout.
